Learning to live with it
Posted on | May 5, 2010 | Comments Off
She guessed that’s what they called “acceptance”…the whole learning to live with it. The “it” she was referring to this time was basically “the way she was” or as she liked to put it, being a bit nuts. No amount of medication in the world was going to make her completely normal because there was no such thing. Everyone had issues. Everyone was a little bit nuts in their own way. How each person dealt with it was the key.
Having spent so much time locked up in her room by her own choice, avoiding the world, only seeing it by staring out the window, she had done herself a great disservice. She missed out on a lot of opportunities, a lot of living. What things she may have missed she will never know, and “what if-ing” wasn’t really going to do any good now other than to help prevent her from doing it again.
She figured she needed to find a way to live life to the fullest without overwhelming herself, which was very easy for her to do. That was one of her issues, overwhelming herself easily, one of the things she needed to learn to live with…Take baby steps, one thing at a time, one day at a time. She wasn’t going to fix all of her problems in a day as much as she’d like to. She also needed to learn to consider those around her, and that by learning to deal with her issues, it would be better for others as well. No one needed to be around her when she was in a bad place. No one deserved that.
She’d gone tonight to visit friends in a shop she used to frequent on a weekly basis. They didn’t have a phone number to contact her, and her disappearance had them concerned. They were thrilled to see her alive and well, and saddened to hear the struggles she’d been through over the last several months. They made her promise she’d come by to visit more frequently, not to spend money, but just to say hello. It made her feel good not only to get out, but to know that people really did care about her, people in an unexpected place. It gave her hope.